Final Week to Hannah

Well we are in the final countdown.  In just 1 week we will be in Hannah Joy's province and preparing to meet her.

Next week will be interesting.  Pray that she adjust quickly and grieves as needed and then bonds to us.   We pray for her to adjust quickly but only God knows.

Today in our life group we were talking about pruning.  It hit me Hannah is about to be pruned as are we.  She will have to give up the only life she has known and does not understand the good life that is waiting on her here.   She has a family that will love her.  A nice home and a room of her own waiting on her.  She will have plenty to eat, she will receive a good education and good daily care.  She is gaining a large family of siblings that will love her.   She has a church that will love her.   But right now she just does not understand that.  To her it will probably feel like someone is kidnapping her and pulling her from the only life she has known.   It will be painful but the pain will lead to better things.

She needs to walk through the grief and she needs to bond.  How much time will this take?  Hopefully not too long.

We will be updating the blog during our journey and will post some pictures here as we go through the process. 

Pray for us as we travel this week.  We will have 2 of the kids with us.  Pray that we stay healthy.  Pray that flights are on time.  Pray for gotya day when we will meet Hannah.   Pray for her to accept us.

We truly appreciate your prayers as we go through this process.  Stay tuned for all the updates as we meet Hannah in the coming days.

Final Countdown

Wow hard to believe we are in the final countdown to travel.   We are busy packing and preparing.  Practicing Mandarin in our spare time, wow what a hard language to learn.

Last Sunday was Fathers Day.  On that day I had the privileged of baptizing Shaun. Additionally we received some great photos and videos of Hannah, what a special day.

Stay tuned to the blog for more details and updates from the trip.

Here are some videos and photos of our beautiful soon to be daughter Hannah Joy.   Wont be long now.

And Now!

Well it appears that everything is in place for our upcoming travel to get Hannah.  It has been frustrating beyond measure. 

We have never come so close to saying uncle and walking away from an adoption.   Cost are unbelievably high and our agency has been a pain lots of hidden fees and just generally hard to work with.  However at the end of the day something that I said during our second adoption kept coming back to haunt me.

When we were considering adopting Shiyan we had major concerns about her condition and wondered if we were properly equipped to handle it.  One day we were talking and praying and I said "To not accept this child would be no different than having an abortion"  So we decided to move forward.  That evening we called a friend to talk about her medical condition and that friend said that at lunch that day they were talking and said "to not accept a child like this would be much like having an abortion".  So we knew this was a word from God for us.

For us aborting one of our biological kids was never an option or even a thought so when this came into play with the adoption it really hit us.  So when this adoption got tough these words kept running through my mind and we decided to keep moving forward.

One other thing is that for past adoptions we have not done any fund raising or grant applications but this time we considered it.  A couple of months ago a local church reached out to us and asked us to apply for their grant through Lifesong for Orphans.We applied and this week learned that we have been given a $3000 matching grant.    We will be posting in the coming days about how you can become involved in this if you feel led to contribute.  This will at least help offset the cost of plane tickets for our upcoming trip.  Thanks for prayerfully considering this.

More updates to come.

Closer to some peace

Well we are getting closer.  We have decided to move forward provided our agency comes through with some updated documents.   We hope to have that in the next day or two.

This morning I went back and read some of my own blog posts from late last year and early this year.   Amazing how your own words have a way of putting things in perspective.  That is one reason I like to blog.   Also the words from Shiyan's adoption continue to run through my head.  I will talk more about this later.

We will update you with more in the coming days.  In the mean time pray for everything to come together.  Pray for Hannah to be prepared for us and for all the change that will happen.  Pray for her to adapt to English quickly and for us to be able to communicate with her as she adapts. Pray for all the financial aspects of the adoption to come together.

Thanks for your prayers.

Here are a few more recent photos of Hannah for you to see. 

Frustration and Decisions!

So every adoption has it's days of frustration and this one has been no exception.  I will have to say that in may ways this adoption has been the most frustrating we have ever done.

A lot of it is the agency that will for now remain unnamed.  On the good side the lady we work with most of the time has been great, she is available day or night, she has made the paperwork very easy and removed a lot of barriers there.   But on the other side the agency itself is a pain to deal with, their documentation and contracts are the worst I have ever seen.  There have been multiple times that we have said "NO WAY" and refused to sign documents until they corrected them.  I cant believe that others just sign these when they are blatantly wrong.   I want documentation to be correct and expect the agency to be on top of these things.  I want to be able to trust them but I just don't.  In my professional life I have to judge people and situations quickly and my gut just does not trust this agency it has not from early in the process and likely never will.  This is my 6th adoption and fourth agency and I have never felt like this toward an agency.     Were it not for our primary contact being so helpful and the fact that we know she is a believer I would have stopped the adoption very early in the process.

Then on the negative side of the lady we are working with, she is stubborn and set in her ways.    If it is not the way she does it then it is wrong.  Debating with her is difficult like running in circles.  We have had to push back to get the Beijing tours which they normally don't do.  Flying back from Hong Kong was a major deal that they did not like.  Travel arrangements have been a nightmare.  That is mostly done now with exception of the in country part (thus the latest frustrations).  I have literally spent hours on the phone with this person that I have yet to meet.  I feel like we have become friends during this process.  If we go forward we will get to meet her in just a few short weeks.

There have been so many times in the adoption where I just wanted to throw up my hands and walk away.    I am here again now.  We are within a month of meeting our daughter and I am so frustrated that I just want to give up.    It seems like the agreements and contracts with this agency just never end and the fees just keep going up.   The cost of this adoption with be over twice what we paid on the first one and is up 60% from our adoption just 4 years ago.    Estimates of in country cost are way higher than we expected.   We are traveling during peak tour season so hotels are higher,(thankful for Marriott points to offset some of this)  air fare is higher, little things like getting a van and driver are outrageous, the cost just keep growing. 

We know that God can and will provide but in the heat of the battle it is hard to keep your eyes on this.   For the first time in our adoptions we looked into grants but only met the criteria for one.  We are still waiting to hear back from that one but it will be a matching grant and this late in the process that wont help much if we even get it.   

I am just tired.  Tired of paperwork, tired of fighting with adoption agencies, tired of the pouring out of money to get a child home, tired of spending most of my free time working on something adoption related.  I am just tired.

Now the big question do we go forward or give up.  I think I know the answer but am praying that God will clearly show me that we are on the right track.   I am ready for this one to be over. 

But then the real challenge begins with helping a 6 year old adjust to a new life in a new place with a language she does not know with people she does not know.   Are we up for this?  Are we the right family for her?  Is this place best for her?

Putting my thoughts down here helps. It helps to vent, it helps to document how I feel it helps to let others take a peak under the curtain that is the life of an adoptive parent.

Early in this adoption a dear friend lead us to a bible verse that on the surface has nothing to do with adoption but for me it did.  Acts 8: 26 to 40 the story of the Ethiopian Eunuch.  In versus 30 and 31 Philip asked "do you know what you are reading?"   and the man responds "How can I unless someone explains it to me"   that really impacted me as we know we have a chance to explain the gospel to another child.   

The above combined with words I spoke during our second adoption (more on that another day) dig deep into my heart and force me to press on with things that frustrate me and scare me. 

Pray for us as we make final decisions and arrangements to get Hannah home. Pray for us to make the right choices for everyone involved.  For us to have patience as we with people and circumstances that frustrate us.  Pray for God to be at the center of this adoption and all that we do and for God to be honored in whatever the outcome of this is.

We do covet your prayers right now and trust that all will work out.