Merry Christmas

Wow it is hard to believe that another year is nearly complete. It has been a big year for our family.

A big anniversary, a new daughter in law, another adoption started and much more.   2015 promises to be another big year.  Follow along here for adoption updates and to follow our trip to China next year.

We have been so truly blessed and thank God for the ways he has blessed and provided for us.

From our family to yours.

Merry Christmas

&
Happy New Year

and as an added bonus here are a couple of pictures of our Joshua that we just received this week.  Next year he will be part of our Christmas photo.

New Photos

Tonight we received some new photos of Joshua.   What an unexpected treat!   He is smiling and seems so happy.    To top that off we were able to video chat with our friend who is in China with her new daughter. 

In other news we should receive our immigration approval this week, which means documents should be headed to China by early December.  This starts the big clock for their approval and then on to the rest of the chase and eventually travel.   Our goal for a few months has been DTC by December 1st and we should be close. 

We will keep you posted on our progress.  Thanks for following along with our journey.

Praying for an adoption

This weekend we have a great friend that is in China adopting a little girl.   She had a lot of challenges getting there, but finally made it.  We were so glad to hear from her and be able to video chat with her.   

Tonight as we prepare to go to bed she prepares to become a mother again.   A little girl will face so much change and confusion as she is removed from what she has known for the last 5 years.  No matter how much they prepared her for this day it will be so hard.

Adoption is a beautiful thing but we often forget the pain of the child.   This little girl lost her biological parents some 5 years ago and now she will lose the only normal she has ever known.   In the long run it will be great for her, she will be loved and cared for so much better here than there.   But for the next few days her heart will likely break.

So we pray for her and for our friend as they adjust to each other.  We also pray for our son Joshua and for the changes that are coming next year for him.   We hope that he is receiving love and attention.  We pray that his health is good and that he is hearing enough words to keep him stimulated.  

We hope that our immigration approval will come soon and that we can get our paperwork headed out and be DTC.    We are ready to get there and get him home, just like our friend Vicki is doing right now.

Before you go to bed tonight say a prayer for orphans around the world and for those transitioning into families.

Orphan Sunday

Today is Orphan Sunday a day when we think about how we can intervene for the fatherless.   For us orphan care is a daily way of life and a point of regular discussion.   How can we best help the fatherless?

There are an estimated 153 million orphans around the world so how can we best impact this?    Adoption is one way but how do we reach out to orphans abroad?   How can we get them into families in their native country?  How can we help orphanages to better care for them?   One thing I know for certain is that all of us have the ability to help the fatherless.  We can pray for them, we can help others adopt, we can do short term mission trips, some of us can move to another country and care for orphans.  Some of us are called to adopt, to foster etc.    We all have a role from the youngest to the oldest we can do something for orphans.

Today at church I had the privilege to address 3 classes and talk about orphan care and I challenged each of them to find what their calling was and to engage.

So what are you called to do?  How can you help?  This is for you to figure out!  But please do consider your role and get involved in caring for widows and orphans in some way.  

I saw a quote from William Carey today;  "Expect great things from God and Attempt great things for God"  This can be applied to everything we do in our daily lives.   Another thing that resonated with me today was "God can bring down walls that are bigger than us", this is so true and we know that without God's hand in our adoptions there is no way we could have made it and we are so thankful that He helped us overcome these walls.

The last thought is that by adopting we have been able to have a front row seat to see God at work in so many ways and are so blessed by seeing the gospel lived out up close and personal.

Take time today to pray for orphans and take time all during November to prayerfully consider what you are supposed to be doing for the fatherless.

Funding Adoptions

So what are your thoughts on fund raisers for adoptions?

I will start by saying that I don't have a strong opinion on this and I am asking this as a legitimate question.  I don't believe there is a right or wrong answer so before you get all up in arms it is just a question to see what your thoughts are. 

We are on our fifth adoption and have never done any fund raisers.  We have had some small gifts from friends and our church but have never gone out looking for donations or done a fund raiser for our adoptions.   We have been very blessed that God has provided for the ability to fund 5 adoptions and has provided for our needs throughout all of this.  We are thankful for anyone that has helped in any way with our adoptions and appreciate any help that we have received.

I know that many families feel called to adopt and without contributions from others they just could not afford to adopt so I believe in these cases it is necessary.   I also have always felt that God allows others to get involved in things by allowing them to give money.   I believe that if you feel God leading you to give money to someone or some cause then you need to be sensitive to that.  Often God will use our abundance to bless others.    I know that many times I have seen where God calls someone to do something that unless they step out in total faith and trust Him to provide it can not be done.  But I also struggle with knowing the cost before starting down a road.

Over the years we have seen some great fund raiser ideas and some not so great ideas.  We know someone doing a fund raiser right now that is really neat but has a limited appeal to those outside the adoption community but non the less it is a cool idea.   What are fund raisers that have worked for you?   Do any of you have a great fund raising activity that might benefit other adopting families.  

There are grants and programs out there but you have to submit a lot of paperwork and there are many families applying for very limited funds.   Some churches offer assistance to their members.   There are also good people that give to help others adopt.  

The doubting side of me wonders if the fund raising is abused at times?   I am sure others have this concern at times so wanted to put it out there.

I really hate talking about the financial side of adoption.   I often get questions from people about how much it cost?   My general answer is "if you are called to adoption it is not about the cost it is about the child and you will do whatever it takes to pay for an adoption"   But at the end of the day it takes money to complete an adoption.  For China it is north of $30,000 by the time you do paperwork, pay necessary fees and travel to receive your child.  For families that have done multiple adoptions it can really add up.  For families that do more than one child at a time it can be very costly.   Then once you get the child home if there are medical needs these have a cost too.   So overall it is very expensive.  But it is never about the money.   I would hate to think that money was the only thing preventing a couple from adopting and know that people have to get creative in finding ways to get the necessary funding.

We are thankful for the blessing of adoption.  We are so thankful that we have had the money to pay for our adoptions.   It has meant sacrifice at times, driving older vehicles, taking smaller less expensive vacations etc. Was it worth it, you bet it was!

So all this said to say that I am personally still on the fence about fund raisers.   I have to say I am considering it more every day.   For this particular adoption we know that we have some large out of pocket expenses when we get home.   Our new son is hearing impaired and will require expensive hearing aids when we get home and these are not covered by insurance.  So any dollar that we can offset on the adoption leaves money to pay for hearing aids.   So we pray daily that God will provide for the needs of our family and our new son.   We know that He will provide.  How we don't know but we have faith and trust in Him to guide us to do the right things. 

If you have thoughts on this topic feel free to comment on this post.  If you have fund raising ideas post those too.  Also comment to let us know if anyone is still reading this little blog.   You wonder some times if anyone even reads this thing.

Thanks for following along with us on this journey.    Here is a newer photo of our new little guy Joshua that I wanted to share with you.

Next

Well our last sermon series was very on track for both of us.   And the new study is "Next A Study of Joshua".    Amazing, we decided to name our new son Joshua because this whole adoption has required a huge step of faith.

Early in the process I used the analogy of Indiana Jones in the scene where he faces the great canyon but he knows he has to step out on faith and trust that something is there.   We felt like that as we prayed about this adoption.  This morning we saw that video clip as the intro into the sermon.   Faith, stepping out into the unknown.

Have you ever felt like the preacher is preaching directly to you?   We have had a lot of that lately.   A verse that really plays in for us is Joshua 3:5 Consecrate yourselves, for tomorrow the Lord will do amazing things among you.   

Looking at this today I see that Joshua was fearful of the unknown.   Several times he was told to "Be Strong and Courageous"  God was telling him to pull together his courage and to have faith.   Even Joshua needed God to tell him to have faith.   That makes me feel so much better about the days when I feel more like Jonah.   I want the faith of Joshua but now I see that he too needed God to tell him to Be Strong and Courageous.

So we are well out into the unknown.  Home study is complete, we are filing with USCIS, we are authenticating documents.   We are paying fees and making progress toward bringing Joshua home.   There will be many expenses, there will be unknowns and frustrations but we need to be strong and courageous.   We need to trust that God will provide needed finances and that He will prepare Joshua for our arrival and that He will help him bond with us and that he will understand all the changes that will be forced on him.    We can see a few steps in front of us and we can trust that He who called us will pave the way to the end.

Joshua 1:5-6  As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.  Be strong and courageous....   Then in verse 7 and 9 he reminds Joshua be strong and very courageous, Do not be afraid, do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.   I wish I had gone back and read these versus a few months ago.   What a motivational talk that Joshua received.

 Well let's see what the coming week holds.   It has been a week of adoption expenses.  I have been debating funding for adaptions and feel like that will be a future blog post.  For now signing off.

Is 8 enough?

Is Eight Enough?   Interesting question.   Well for us we know that 7 is not enough so 8 it shall be.   This weekend we were at at the beach and every time it was table for 6 with us and the 4 little ones.  Well it will now be a table of 7.   Yes there will be another stocking on the mantle, another plate at the table during big family dinners, another car seat in the car.  8 children total but 3 are grown and on their own (for the most part) but yes 5 little ones at home.

A beautiful sunset at the beach.

  Another smiling face to join this crew!

"What!!! you ask?   Are you crazy?  Do I need to have you committed?  Are you opening an orphanage in your home?  Don't you know when to stop?"   "How many do you plan to adopt?"  "Are you rich?"  These are just a few of the responses we have received as we have shared this news over the past few weeks.

First of all the main reason for the delay in the announcement was respect for Aaron and Karen's wedding.  We promised them that we would not announce the latest adoption until after they had their time.   Well that time is passed so now we are talking about this news.

Now some background:   This all started back in March, our friend Carrie sent us a photo of a little girl that could have passed for Maria's twin.  We both said that if she was adoptable we would go for it.  Well as it turned out she was already locked by someone else.   So at that we thought it was a closed book.   Then in late June, Robin saw a picture of a little boy that looked a lot like Shaun.   So we started praying about adopting again.   At first I thought "No Way" I really was not wild about starting the process again.  But over the following weeks we talked about it a lot, we both prayed about it.  We prayed that if we were not on the right track that God would close the door.   However doors kept opening.   We both clearly felt God leading us to do this again.   It is hard to explain how you know when God is speaking to you.   For us it was in many ways, through bible study, prayer, conversations with people, sermons at church etc.  Back during the time we were praying about the little girl, we met a child with the same condition that our new little guy has and were able to see how wonderfully she was doing.

We reached out to some friends that had adopted a child with this condition to learn about their experience.   Before we could even talk to them they sent us a picture and asked us to pray for this child to find a family, it was the little boy we were already praying about.  We met people that had been down this road and learned so much about a medical condition that we had not worked with before.   People came into our path that were unexpected  We connected with a wonderful doctor that helped educate us.

So in July we started the process again.  This time with a new agency since they had his file and would not release it.  So far they have been fine to work with.  We are expecting our home study this week and will get into the immigration process.  If all goes according to plan then hopefully we can travel next May or June.

I guess by now if you have been following along you are just ready for a picture!  First some facts.  He is 19 months old, he has a hearing condition.  His name will be Joshua. 

So now finally introducing Joshua Collier the latest addition to our family.

Isn't he cute?

He looks a lot like Shaun.

You may think we are crazy but for us we know we are right where we are supposed to be and that this little boy needed a family and that we have room for one more.  Please pray for the process to go smoothly and quickly.  Pray for him to have good care while he waits for us.  Pray that he adjust to us quickly.  Pray for the other kids as this will mean change for them too.  Pray that all the finances required for an adoption come together so we can get him home quickly.  Pray for us to seek God's will in our lives and in this process.

So there you have it after weeks of talk about being "All In" and going where "faith is without borders"  this is our All In for this season.   Trust me we have been taken to places where it has required a lot of faith to step out on this path. 

What does it all mean

So what does it mean to be "All In"?   As I have stated previously it is often a daily decision to be all in.  It requires stepping out on faith.  It requires the faith of Joshua and not giving in to the fears of Jonah.   At times it requires just taking that first step and trusting God to shine light on the next step.

For the past several months we have been struggling with a major decision and many things we have been reading and hearing have been so timely and have spoken to us in a great way.  One of the things I heard recently was an interview with David Platt as he talked about taking the new position as President of the International Mission Board.   In this talk he spoke about making our lives a blank check and putting that blank check out before God and allowing Him to spend our lives as He sees fit.    Then today our pastor talked about this same thing and even gave us "All In" checks that we could sign and lay on the altar.   In the memo it says "Whenever, Wherever, Whatever.    Wow this is a huge statement.   Am I willing to do whatever, wherever and whenever God asks of me?  Am I truly "All In"?

 I need to fill out my commitment card and decide what I "will put down" and what I will "pick up"?   I know part of it and need to pray about the rest.

I know that whatever I put I must be completely surrendered to Jesus and continually decide to surrender to Him and allow Him to be the leader of my life.  It will require daily decisions to put down and to pick up. 

So what would you put on your blank check of your life?   Are you willing to follow where ever He leads?

I mentioned that we have been struggling with a major decision.   It all started back in April.  We thought a door was open but it was not.  But looking back we now see that it was just something to prepare us for another opportunity that would come up in late June.   So many things that we saw in April were directly related to the opportunity in June.   Often God works that way, He will give you a glimpse and will  prepare you for something that is down the road.

Well we made a decision back in early July and I had intended to talk more about it today.  However I will hold off a few more days until we get a little snag worked out.    We know that this is what we are supposed to be doing.  We know that His hand is in this and we know that He will provide through it.   We believe that there will be blessings as a result of being willing to follow but would do it without the promise of any blessings.   We know that many of our family and friends will think we are crazy.   First of all I don't recall asking for their approval or permission.    Secondly I have never really cared what others think. But I can say we are "All In" on this decision.   More on this in the coming days.

For now think about the blank check of your life.   What should be written on your check?   Are you to adopt, foster care, go into ministry, change jobs, drop an addiction, be more submerged into God's word?   What do you need to pick up?  What do you need to put down?  Are you willing to be a blank check?  How can God use you?   Be willing to get "All In" 

As full disclosure I will also state that I struggle with being all in.  I like to be in control and being all in requires that you operate on faith and that you are not in control so for me it is a daily decision and it is a decision topic by topic.  The goal is to daily turn more of my life over to Him and allow Him to be more in control.   Through these daily steps of turning over I will hopefully become more All In over time and will become that blank check that I need to be.

More on being "All In"

We continue the thoughts on being All In.

Being all in requires great sacrifice.  It requires that you take imitative.

This leads to an altered life (ALLtered).

It requires giving yourself away daily.  

A quote from Jim Elliott many times in the past but it resounded with me today.   "He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep in order to gain what he cannot lose!"

So are you all in?  What is your all in about?   I know clearly what my all in question is right now and we will talk more about that soon.   I think our all in items change depending on what our focus of the time is or what mission God has for us at the time.   But at the same time I think that All In is an attitude and that if you are willing to be all in it will permeate to all of your life and will allow God to use you in so many ways.   It boils down to being willing to surrender all.   

There is a song that goes "I give myself away so you can use me"  that has been running through my head all day today.  

I think for all of us we need to examine our attitude daily and be willing to be ALL IN!

Stay tuned for more big news in the coming days.  

Wedding Pics

here are a few photos from our son's wedding.

 My beautiful bride.

Us with our boys.

Our girls with their grandmother.

The wonderful couple.   We are very excited for them and can't wait to see how God uses them.

Changes and growth

Just a short post.   Today we gained a daughter.   Aaron married his princess Karen.  It was a beautiful wedding.  She looked like a Disney Princess, it brought tears to all of our eyes when we saw her in the beautiful gown.    It was one of the most beautiful weddings I have ever attended.  They had a worship service during the wedding.   (I will post pics soon, too tired tonight)

So two of our sons are now married and we have added two wonderful daughters to our family.

There are more changes and more news in the works.  We will have to post more about that later.  We can only handle one event at a time and must allow time for this blessed event to pass. 

We could not be happier for our son and his new wife. 

To say we are tired would be an understatement.  We had 7 kids in the wedding today from the Groom, 2 groomsmen, 3 flower girls and a ring bearer.  They all looked so wonderful but it is hard having that many of your kids in one wedding but great to see them all standing up there with their brother and to have everyone home. 

We are blessed to have a big family.   We were also blessed to have close friends and family along side us for this weekend.  Mammaw (Dad's mom) was here along with dad's sister, brother and sister-in-law so a wonderful time of reunion.   It has been a great week and a wonderful wedding.

Stay tuned for pictures and for more on being All In!  Have the faith of Joshua and not the fear of Jonah.  I pray daily for the faith of Joshua!

Being All In requires intimacy

I have been very interested in our current sermon series of All In.   It has really been timely for us in many ways and has spoken to us in many ways.  Some ways are obvious and others will become obvious to others over time.

This week the lesson was; "Being All In requires Intimacy"  A symbol for intimacy was the Yoke.    If you are in a yoke you are side by side, shoulder to shoulder, pulling together to achieve a task.  You are hooked to the plow.  You are stronger together than either of you would be alone.   This year was our 30th anniversary and I can't imagine being yoked to anyone other than Robin.  We have been side by side often pulling together to get something done.

Earlier this year there was a time when I a dominant right handed person had an injury to my right wrist.  At the same time Robin a dominant left handed person had a cyst on her left wrist.   We had both had limited  use of our primary hand.  But we teamed up and got everything done that needed done.   We helped each other and worked together to accomplish what we had to do.  Both using our non dominant hand and working together.

This week one of our sons will be married.  He will be shoulder to shoulder with his new wife.  There will be times that they will pull together, there will be times that they will pull against each other.   The yoke is their commitment to God and family to stay together and get through the bad times and to pull together to serve God.   We pray that their bond will be strong and that they will have a blessed life together.

To make it in marriage you have to be all in.  You have to consider the yoke to be long term.  You have to be all in for the duration.  "Till Death do us Part".  I am thankful that we made it through the difficult times.  I am thankful that we kept our shoulder to the task and pulled through difficulty.  

For us this week is focused on the wedding and preparing for family and friends to be here.    Stay tuned to see how this series of All In turns out.   It seems like I learn something new about it every day and see ways how it is being played out in our daily lives.

Are you All In?

You never know how adoption will impact you or those around you.    In a little less than 2 weeks one of our sons will marry a wonderful young lady.   Funny part is how they initially met.

Back when our son was a new transfer student at his university a young lady heard that a new guy was on campus and that he had 3 sisters from China.  This girl had always wanted to adopt and wanted to get to know this guy.   Well they first became friends and then eventually started dating and will marry soon.   How neat to think that us adopting the girls led to this initial interest.

We now wonder will they adopt?  If so when and from where?   I know they both have a heart for adoption and that excites me.

How does it impact others around you?   Trust me if you talk with me for more than a few minutes you will learn that I have a heart for adoption and we will be talking about it.   Many of our friends are from the adoptive family community.   It has a profound impact.

I guess you can say that we are "All In" when it comes to caring for children and adopting.  What does it mean to be all in?  To be all in you have to give everything and hold nothing back.  You have to be intentional, you need intensity and it will lead to an investment.   A young lady this week said "If I am not all in am I in at all?  Wow a lot of wisdom in that statement.

This week I was talking with a nurse at my doctors office and she just could not understand how someone could adopt.  "All that money"  "It cost $240,000 to get a child through high school" and on and on and on she went.   I explained that if adopting was a calling you felt the money was not a factor and that even having additional biological children was often a calling.    After I walked away it occurred to me, what is she investing in?   I wonder do they have a huge house?   Do they drive new cars?  Do they have a boat or jet ski's?   Do they pay big money for season tickets to see some sports team play?  Do they eat out 5 times a week?   What have they invested in?   Not that any of this is necessarily bad but just that we have chosen to invest in another area.  We feel that God called us to raise children and to adopt and therefore we have invested in that area.   We have chosen to stay in our home and not dream of a bigger newer house.  We chose to drive older cars, to not have boats and other toys. It is a choice and we don't regret it. 

Today in church our pastor talked about priorities and that you can only have one main priority in life and that you need to be able to identify that one priority.  For me it did not require much thought God is first and family is second.  3 of the results of our main priority after God were sitting with me and their mother and their 3 older brothers were in various places in multiple states and their younger brother was nearby in church too.   We believe that as a result of God being a priority in life he led us to adopt and to follow Him in that way.

What is your main priority in life?  Are you "All In"?  Is God first?   What has being "All In" cost you?  Are you intentional, intense and invested?   Is your main priority the right priority or should you be seeking what the real priority should be?   Be willing to put your hand to the plow and seek the treasure that God has for you.  Invest in the things that matter.   For you that may be much different than it has been for us.   We feel confident that our main priority is the right one for us and are very thankful for where it has led us.

Thought for this week.  What are you "All In for"?

What is Courageous Faith

So what is courageous faith?  Is it jumping out of an airplane?  Is it a firefighter running into a burning building (been there done that plenty of times)?  A police officer in a gun battle?   A soldier defending our freedoms?  A diver diving off a cliff?    There are so many things that we could say take courageous faith and they take a lot of courage and a lot of faith in something.

The kind of courageous faith I am talking about is the faith in God to follow a still small voice when he calls you to do something.   To follow when he puts a burden on your heart.   This too takes courage and faith in God.    Often it can take a LOT of FAITH in GOD and a willingness to step outside your comfort zone! 

I believe that often God places opportunities in front of us and there are times that He clearly wants us to go through one door in particular.  Other times there may be 2 or 3 doors and it may not be so clear which one is the right one.    One could be easy and you would still be within God's will.  The other may clearly have challenges, cost and chances of pain but you know that if you walk through that door there are likely blessings that will be bestowed on you if you are just willing to take that first step and follow. 

On some of these doors once you step through you see more of the picture and it becomes more clear what is before you. Other times you walk through the door and a light shines on the next step or two and you have to keep taking steps to have more revealed to you.   These are the doors that often take courageous faith.   Walking in the dark and allowing Him to shine the light where he wants you to go.   Not knowing how it will all turn out or what obstacles lay in the path that could trip you.   At these times you have two choices, to turn back and refuse to follow or to walk slowly and hold the Masters hand and allow Him to show you the way, trusting totally in Him to keep you from falling.   In many ways this type walk takes more courage than jumping off a cliff.

What is He asking you to do that is hard?  What doors are before you?   Do you know which one to select?  Is there a clear path?  Do you have the faith to follow?  Do I have the faith to follow, some days I wonder! 

What does all of this have to do with adoption?  I can tell you from our adoption journeys that we have walked through some of these dark doors and we have seen the hand of God at work.  We have had front row seats to some miracles.   We have seen blessings that we would have totally missed had we taken the easy road.   We have received blessings from our children, from friends that we would have never known had we not gone through these doors.  We may never know all of the blessings that resulted from a simple choice to say yes.    Some other time I may detail out some of these blessings and miracles we have seen.

Could we have taken the easy road and still been within God's will?  Probably!  Did we always pick the right door?  I doubt it.  Are there more doors to choose from?  Sure there are!   Will it be scary?  You bet it will be.  I can say that it has not always been easy, it often does not make sense from an earthly perspective and we usually can only see a short distance ahead.    I can also say that we have no regrets for going down this road.  We are so thankful that we have seen the gospel lived out through adoption.

No matter if it is adoption or another door that God places before you, prayerfully consider the opportunities that God gives you and be willing to walk with Him leading you.  You never know what blessings you will find along the way.

Couragious Faith and Some just don't get it

Anyone that has ever adopted has likely run into the family member or friend that just does not get it.  We have gone through this.  When we first told my dad that we were adopting Laura he did not understand why after having 3 boys we would want to adopt a little girl.  He did not understand why we wanted to go to China?  He just did not get it.  I told him that we felt this was a path that God had for us and that if he had questions about it he knew God's number and he could call and discuss it with Him.

It is hard when those closest to us don't understand something we are doing or when they reject it.  This is when you have to lean on your faith and follow where God is trying to lead you.   It may not be easy it may not make sense but if you feel this is the path you are to be on then follow it.

Last week we had a study of Courageous faith, we talked about Joshua and other examples of just stepping out and trusting!.   One illustration that resonated with me was in the Indiana Jones movie when he is on that cliff and his book tells him there is a trail there but he can not see it.   He takes that huge step out over the unknown.  If he is wrong he will fall to his death.   His foot hits the path and only then can he see the reality of what is in front of him.   

Lately we have been trying to see the trail and know where to step and it is amazing that when you take that first step it becomes more clear.

Another example from last week was the song Ocean's by Hillsong United.  The words say "Your grace abounds in deepest waters, your sovereign hand will be my guide.  Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me, You've never failed and You won't start now.   So I will call upon Your name, and keep my eyes above the waves. When oceans rise, my soul will rest in your embrace.  For I am Yours and You are mine."  

It goes on to say:  " Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders, let me walk upon the waters, wherever you would call me.  Take me deeper than my feet could ever wonder and my faith will be made stronger, in the presence of my Savior."

This spoke volumes to me and reminded me that when we are in waters that are over our head that if we are following His leading he will be there to keep us from drowning.   The hard part is taking that first step to a path you can't see or jumping into deep and rough waters it takes trust and faith.

Getting back to my dad, he finally got it.   It took time, all through the process he refused to talk about adoption and had no interest at all.   It was after we got home, when he and Laura met, I was able to watch a miracle as he fell in love with his granddaughter.  He loved all of the girls so much, unfortunately he never got to meet Shaun.  But I am thankful to say I was there to see it when he got it.

Next post I may talk about other miracles that  we have seen as we have walked the adoption journey.  It has been so interesting to see God at work up close and personally.   On our recent vacation I met a man (minister) and we started talking and somehow got on the topic of adoption.  He was very interested and said "I bet you have seen God at work through your adoptions?"  We shared some stories and he ended by saying "you need to write a book"  Wow another interesting thought. 

Oh well enough for now I will share some additional ramblings soon. For now Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders!

Some History and Background

For those of you that know us well and have followed our story this may be a bit repetitive.  For those that have not followed so long then it may educate you a little about us.

Back in about 1996 Robin and I both heard a news story on the radio about the situation with little girls in China.  That evening at dinner it came up and I said "someone needs to do something about that", Robin said "I think we are supposed to do something about it".   Well that night started 6.5 years of prayer, discussion, debate and fights about adopting.

I did not ever see us adopting.  I made a lot of comments about how I could never love an adopted child as much as our biological sons.   I talked about the fact that our boys were reaching an age where we would have some freedom.   I had a thousand reasons why we could not adopt.   The fact that Robin felt so called to adopt and that I did not was a wedge between us.   I was stone cold against it.

Fast forward to 2003, and we end up at a conference that was my idea and the opening entertainment was non other than Steven Curtis Chapman.   He shared their adoption testimony and I had heart surgery that night, performed by God right there in my seat.   My heart melted and I knew we had been called to adopt.  I thought we can do this one time!

So late that Friday night we got home and I was on the computer researching adoption.   We made sure the boys were on board and they were so the next week we started the process.  This led to Laura in December 2004.   While we were in China we knew we were called to do at least one more adoption.   So in 2005 we started the process for Shiyan, due to many delays it would be March 2007 before we could go get her.

Then in 2010 we would be back there again for Maria.  Who would have known that we would be called back yet again and in April 2013 , this time we were back for Shaun. 

It was all in His timing and His will.  We know that each of these children were intended for our family.   We are so thankful for each of them and for the blessings we have found through their additions to our family. 

Amazing the blessing you will find if you follow the path that is before you.   I shutter to think how different our lives would be had we said no to any of these blessings.  If you ever feel called to adopt or to follow God on any other major path, prayerfully consider it and be open to His leading.  You may never know what blessing are out there for you if you are just willing to answer when called.  A great verse to sum all of this up is Isaiah 6:8 "Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "whom shall I send? and Who will go for us?" and I said, "Here am I. Send me!"

If you ever want to learn more about adoption send us a note we will be glad to answer any questions you might have.

Thanks for following our humble little blog.  We hope you get something positive out of it.

Beyond Terrible Two's

For any of you that know us well you know that the past 15 months have been a bit of a roller coaster ride.     We received Shaun 4 days before his second birthday, just in time to receive the full benefit of the terrible twos.  Add to that a dad with a messed up wrist and three surgeries, plus all the day to day things that go with having a large family, it has been a bit of a rush.


I am so thankful that God made it abundantly clear to us that Shaun was the child for us on the day we received his referral.  We had a peace that surpassed understanding about him.  That really helped on those difficult days over the past year.  We feared many days that the terrible twos would become the trying threes.


Shaun is a wonderful little guy and we have all grown to love him so much.  However for the first year he was with us he was angry and destructive a lot of the time.   He would break things and throw tantrums.  His vocabulary was limited and adjustment was hard.   Our house had gates restricting him from getting to the girls rooms, from the TV and entertainment center etc.  It has been an obstacle course around here. But then around the time he turned 3 it was almost like we flipped a switch.   He became so loving, began talking all the time, stopped being destructive.    He loves everyone in the family but is really a daddy's boy.   He is smart, and likes to understand how things work.    He now loves to talk and can easily communicate his needs.  So as we progress gates are coming down and life is slowly returning to the new normal.


We are thankful for these improvements and are so thankful that he is part of our family.   Adoption is never easy, it begins with loss.  The loss of a child for the biological parents.  The loss of parents for a child.  Then just when the child thinks things are settling down along come new parents that don't look like them, don't smell like them and talk so funny.  And these new people upset everything and take the child to a new strange place.  Friends are now lost, food is different, language is different, everything is different!   So children react in different ways and some are like Shaun some worse.   Thankfully most of the time they do adjust, some faster than others.  We are thankful that the terrible twos seem to have stopped for us.


We are thankful that this phase of adjustment is over and that Shaun has made so much progress. 

We are also thankful for all the ways we have been blessed through adoption and are thankful that all of our children have adjusted and are as much a part of our family as anyone.   With healing comes new growth and some times the new part is stronger than what was there before.  

Well that is my ramblings for today.   Stay tuned for more.  Lots happening around, a wedding in the works, lots of family coming in, school starting back up, lots of work stuff, life happens.

The bonds and connections of adoption

This weekend we attended the annual Wanzai Sisters Reunion.    This is a gathering of some of the families that traveled to China with us when we adopted Laura.   This year the trip took us to Memphis Tennessee.   We walked and ate our way through Memphis.  We watched the marching of the ducks at the world famious Peabody Hotel, had several great meals, walked through the city, watched street performers on Beale Street, waded through the scale model of the Mississippi River at Mud Island, made crafts with the kids and caught up on what has been going on in each others lives.   Kind of like a family reunion with relatives that you rarely get to see.

Looking back to 2004 it was a cold Sunday afternoon in Nanchang, 14 families sat in a hotel conference room and waited for our names to be called to come up and meet our child. We had been together for a few short days prior to that.  We met some of the families in the airport in Japan and others at the Beijing airport and the rest once at the hotel.  We spent Friday and Saturday touring in Beijing seeing The Forbidden City, The Great Wall and other sites around the area.   Then on Sunday morning we flew off to the province where our children were from.   We got to the hotel and had to get things in order to be ready to meet our children that afternoon.   We barely sat down and we got the call, the kids are here, please proceed to the hotel meeting room. 

The kids had endured the 3 hour van ride to the capital of their province to meet their new families.  The 14 little girls that were all around 1 year old were tired and scared by the time they reached us around 4 pm.  We all sat there waiting, most of us were on our first adoption trip so had no clue what would be next.  You cold have cut the tension in the room with a knife.  When they called our names we quickly went up and were handed a child that was crying and scared.  For us it happened quickly I believe we were second. We jumped up and went to the front.  Then they called another name and the next couple would go up.  It was quick and in many ways difficult.  We met a child that did not initially like us, we smelled different we talked different, we disrupted their little lives, we turned their world upside-down.  There was a lot of crying, babies crying, parents crying, I was probably as scared as Laura was and trust me she was scared!

Job one bond with your child.  This happened more quickly for some than for others.  The first night for us was hard then on Monday we began to get into a grove. During the following days we shared meals together with our travel mates, we hung out at the hotels together and we became friends.  Our little ones played together and we all began to adjust.

Now over 9 years later we still manage to get several families together for a reunion each summer.    We share a bond, a connection that is lasting, some call it the red thread of adoption.    Our girls spent the first year of their lives in the same orphanage.   This is a key part of their life and who they are.  It is important to us that they remember this bond with each other.  We as parents share a bond, we traveled together half way around the world, some of us scared to death and wondering how we got there.   We supported each other during the trip.  We connected and developed lasting friendships that are a true blessing.  

We have traveled this adoption journey 4 times and I am so thankful that this first travel group stays in touch and that we are able to stay connected as our daughters grow up.  This is one of the blessings of adoption.  Just think we now have friends in Illinois, Georgia, Indiana, Texas, Kansas, Pennsylvania, Michigan and other states thanks to a trip to meet our daughter.  These are people we likely would have never met, lives we would have never been blessed to interact with.  

Adoption brings many challenges and many blessings and this is just one of the added bonuses that some are blessed to receive.   We are thankful for the Wanzai reunion and thankful for the years that we have been able to attend.   The worst part is that it only lasts a weekend.   It is hard to say goodbye at the end knowing it may be a year or more before you see most of the families again.   But in the end we are very thankful that we were able to attend and look forward to the next gathering.

Below are a few photos from this years journey to Memphis on Fathers Day Weekend.

 The group at a park.  Note that our other kids have just become a part of the group too.

 Some of the dads hanging out and catching up.

 The girls taking a well deserved break

 Getting ready to say goodbye for this year.

We are so thankful that God called us to adopt. It has truly changed our lives forever and in a wonderful way.  If you ever feel God calling you to adopt, listen to the call you never know what blessings are just around the corner and you never know how it will change your life in a wonderful and lasting way.

And a chapter closes

Today we attended the college graduation of one of our sons.  It was bittersweet.    We are so happy for him completing his education.  We look forward to his upcoming marriage to a wonderful young lady.  We look forward to moving him to his first apartment for his first real adult job.  And most of all we look forward to watch and see how God  will use him.    This all excites us a lot.

At the same time it was sad to see his time at the University end.  He made so many good friends.   We have so enjoyed getting to know some of these friends and to spend time with them.  Some of these young men have spent time in our home, we have shared meals with them and they have become a valued part of our lives.   We were blessed to spend time with a couple of these guys this weekend and really enjoyed our time with Andrew and Joseph and are so thankful for the role they have played in Aaron's life.

We know it is sad for Aaron to see this chapter of his life close.  We know he will miss his friends.  But it is exciting to see the enthusiasm he has about the next chapter of his life.   We know he is excited about his upcoming marriage and new job.    So today tears were shed.  Tears of sadness for a chapter that is closing.  Tears of rejoicing over the accomplishment of one of our children.  Tears of anticipation for what is next.  And most importantly tears of gratefulness for the ways God has blessed his life and how He has used Aaron and for how He will use him in the future.

So as a chapter closes another opens and such is life for most of us.  We can't stay stranded in what is comfortable, we must press on and follow where God leads us and try to be sensitive to His leading in our lives. 

We are proud of you Aaron and know that the future will be bright and that this chapter closing and this new open beginning is the first of many transitions like this as you progress through life.  Seize the day!

1 year ago

Hard to believe that 1 year ago yesterday we were in China receiving Shaun.   He has come so far in many ways and has a long way to go in other areas.

He is quite the little ninja, he can sneak into a room destroy something and get out without being detected.   He can also melt your heart with his smile and laugh along with a big hug.    He is so smart and learns something new every day.

It has been a very interesting year.  Huge blessings in many ways and challenges in others.  We are thankful and blessed to have him as part of our family.

Happy Gotya Day Shiyan

Hard to believe that it has been 7 years ago yesterday since we were in  China meeting Shiyan.


Seems like she has been with us forever but oh how she has changed in those 7 years.  She was a very weak little girl and is now so strong in so many ways.


That day 7 years ago was so hectic after 7 hours stuck in the Beijing airport and then we finally made it to her town and rushed over to receive her before the government office closed for the day.  She was so happy to see us and saw Robin and said Momma immediately.  She warmed up to the entire family right away.

We are so thankful to have her as part of our family and love her so much.  We thank God for bringing us together and for all the ways He has blessed us.

Wow Hard to Believe

Wow it is hard to believe that 4 years ago today we were in China receiving Maria.  We had met her a few days earlier at New Day and finally the big day had come.  However getting from Beijing to Zhengzhou was something from a movie script.

On that Sunday morning January 3rd we got up to snow on the ground and by the time we reached the airport it was snowing hard.  Flights were delayed and the snow was piling up.  The lady at our gate kept saying one moment.   Soon you could tell that we were not going anywhere that day.    We kept pushing them for answers.  We knew that Maria was on a train headed to Zhengzhou and that we needed to get there too.   After 12 hours stuck in the airport we  pushed our guide to get us out of the airport to Laura and Shiyan could get some rest.  It was after 10 before we got out of the airport and we ended up back at the hotel after midnight.  I remember we got a room with a view of Tienanmen Square (big deal).   We got to bed and some time during the night they called to tell us to be up early to take the train.  God showed up along the way and took care of so many things for us during those two days.

Then finally we were there and Maria became our daughter, what a glorious day.

In other news it has been a while since we posted, sorry for that but it has been crazy.   At Thanksgiving our oldest son and his wife came to visit for a week.  This was the first time we had all 7 kids in the same place since the addition of Shaun.   It was great having all the kids together.

Then before you knew it we were into Christmas.  We celebrated Laura's gotya day in December. Add to that surgery twice for dad to repair a wrist issue and wow the time has flown by.  Christmas was great.  Aaron and Stephen were home.  Aaron's fiance came to visit for several days and we were all able to enjoy a lot of family time.   We are truly blessed in so many ways.

We will update as we have major events.  Thanks for continuing to follow along.